Artemis Fowl: Fairy Tales
by Athemia
Summary: Root goes missing, an unexplained power source is found in Haven. This is a mystery only Artemis and Holly can solve. To return Haven to its norm, they must play a game. What kind of game?
1. Encounter

_**AN:** Okay, second fanfic :) this is for my friend (1st Female LEPrecon), who had ever annoyed me to write it. This should please her :P The plot of this story came to me when I was doing a History Test and I had finished early. Heh, interesting, no? This story might not progress too quickly, since I'm mainly focusing on my **Twilight** fanfic. I hear you ask, then why start this one? Like I said, I had written an AF fanfic but I didn't really like the idea. I'm starting this one for my friend. That just shows what a nice person I am :) lol. Anyway, long enough dribble, I'll start the story. I don't think there'll be too much A/H in here, but I'll try :)_

_**Setting:** The story is set about two years after OD, even though Root isn't dead and Holly still has her job. Artemis still has his communicator though :)_

_**Disclaimer:** Nothing of Arty belongs to me. Nothing except for the plot, extra characters, scenery… I'm sure that doesn't count as too much ;)_

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**Chapter One**

**Encounter**

_On the way to St. Bartleby's_

Artemis scowled.

It was a face he was pulling more and more often, ever since his mother had _insisted_ that he spend more time with people his age. Despite his reasons, tricks and overall, trying to avoid the situation, his parents had pushed him into staying at St. Bartleby's for the winter break.

Unfortunately, this move prevented Artemis from any contact with his laptop. He had managed however, to smuggle in his fairy communicator that Holly had given him, disguising it as one of those pointless electronic hand held games he had seen many boys his age playing. Blissfully ignorant Angeline Fowl had been delighted to see that her little Arty was getting in touch with his 'inner child', and happily let Artemis take it along.

At the moment, Artemis was in the backseat of the Bentley, and yes, still scowling. No one was there to see it however. Butler had been commanded by Fowl Senior to stay, and Juliet was to accompany him instead. Butler was less than happy, but he knew that Juliet could now offer him more protection than he himself could.

Juliet was sitting in the front seat, not driving. She too, had an ugly scowl on her pretty face. The driver was a lanky chauffer, and he occasionally sent a cocky grin to his shotgun partner. On the rare occasion that Juliet had acknowledged the hormone filled boy, she glared like him if he was a particularly large insect. Her usually bubbly, enthusiastic and chatty self was replaced by a sulky one. What was she to do in an _all boys'_ school? As much as she liked being Artemis' bodyguard, this was definitely stepping over the line. She continued to sulk.

The boy that was chauffeuring them had been trying to make small talk over the last hour, but his idiotic attempts to make speech was ignored by Artemis ("Nice weather, don't you think?" Artemis had stared out the window, where the rain had been pounding on relentlessly over the past hour). Artemis' new rule was to ignore anyone who didn't know how to say the word 'incapacitated' ("I incapitated him, I did").

The two icy people in the car was enough to drive anyone out of their mind with fear, but since Artemis had demanded that a dark tint window be fitted in between the front and backseat of the car. Juliet, of course, protested, but Artemis had pointed out that it was not sound proof, merely visual proof. This way he just rolled up the window whenever the boy wanted to make small talk with him, doing them both a favor.

For Juliet however, it just decreased the already limited space she could have with avoiding the boy. He had long given up trying to get a response out of her, but for Juliet the closeness of the boy that obviously had no idea was deodorant was, was less than comfortable. The car drive went on in that steely silence that none of the two main occupants were about to break anytime in the near future.

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_Police Plaza, Haven_

Holly was absentmindedly twirling a pen between her fingers, the long report she was supposed to be writing forgotten. The whirring of nearby machines now faded into the distance, as she stared at her desk lamp. It was new, fluorescent green, and very bright, illuminating her whole office in a sickly green glow. Holly's colours tended to change with her mood. She wasn't feeling particularly sick, but the words _green with envy_ was a phrase she could relate to that day. Not that she'd ever admit it.

Foaly had now registered a new patent, and she had been eager to try it out. It was supposedly a machine that could show a solid hologram; in other words, conjure up something out of thin air. However, of course, _Lily Frond_ just had to use that high pitched whiny voice, flick her stupid long bleached hair and get her way. She had conjured up her own mirror, lipstick, mascara, shampoo, nail polish, blush, foundation and about fifty magazines, when the battery died.

Foaly had been using a battery for the particular thing, because he didn't know if it could work with all power sources. Now he was modifying it so it could be adapted into a nuclear power source. It wouldn't take him more than a day or two, but Holly had really wanted her own stuffed afro dog. She had seen it on one of those Mud Man advertisements, and they were so cute! But no, Lily had to take her time, thinking over the pros and cons of green mascara and blue mascara for about thirty minutes. It was the only time Holy had seen thinking lines crease her brow. How Frond had been able to think that deeply at all with her IQ level was beyond Holly.

Of course, all these thoughts only registered because she wanted something to sulk at. Nothing had gone her way that week. Root shouted at her regularly now five times a day, and she had been given Chix Verbil as a partner.

_I mean, god!_ She thought to herself, _how does a sprite like that live life without crashing into something? So star crossed I wouldn't be surprised to see his eyes grow star shaped._

After stewing in her own thoughts, the intercom squawked out a message, interrupting Holly's battle with her inner rage. She only heard the last few bits of it.

"… through emergencies, so please don't touch it!"

_Touch what?_ She wondered absent mindedly. She brushed it off though, not thinking that it was too much of a big deal. She slid out of her wheelie chair and decided to go to the cafeteria. Food would get her mind off things… She almost smiled at the thought of a chocolate smoothie, or maybe a milkshake.

She reached the door, and it was locked. Frowning, Holly pushed the door again, but it didn't budge. Cursing under her breath, she turned to the snack machine. She pushed a few rusty coins she had found from deep in her pocket, and selected a sandwich. The light didn't even blink. She heard the clattering of her money as it fell into the machine, but nothing came out. She scowled. This was so not her day.

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_St. Bartleby's, Ireland_

Artemis had refused to get out of the car. It was pretty childish behaviour, but he stepped out unwillingly when Juliet had taken his suitcase out of the boot of the car. The boy chauffeur lingered, but the daggers Juliet was sending him seemed to break through his infatuation. After meekly sliding the car away, she walked along Artemis, their expressions startlingly alike as they approached the school. When h reached the main hall, he was ambushed by a few of the boys he knew from class, who had been attracted from Juliet's more than average appearance. Artemis remembered that one of their names was… Lark?

"So, I never knew Artemis had a sister." The one Artemis thought was called Lark said.

"I'm not his sister." She replied bluntly, walking past them.

"So who are you? I'd remember a face like yours."

Artemis rolled his eyes, but kept walking. If he said anything, it would probably end in physical contact, and he strongly doubted that any of these boys could take Juliet on. He walked on to the computer lab, but Juliet went to dump his things. A lot of the boys trailed after her, but the boy he thought was called Lark followed him.

"What do you want? The girl went _that_ way, if you didn't see." He muttered.

Lark went to sit on the computer besides him, watching Artemis.

"Oh, I saw. Who is she?"

"Go ask her."

Artemis' fingers were flying over her keyboard, so fast they seemed almost blurred. Lark didn't leave though.

"I'm asking you, computer freak."

Artemis didn't answer, his clear blue eyes never moving an inch off the loading screen. It was so _slow_…

"Hey, nerd, did you hear me?"

"No."

Artemis tapped a few keys, and slipped a disk from his pocket, loading it onto his file.

"Who's the girl?"

"Did _you_ hear _me_?"

"What?"

Artemis smirked at the boy, who was obviously getting angry.

"I said, go ask her."

"I'm asking you!"

The boy he thought was called Lark's voice rose to a shout, and a head popped in.

"Mark, keep your voice down." The teacher admonished.

_Well, I was close,_ Artemis thought dryly.

The boy mumbled an apology, shot Artemis a filthy look and then walked off. In the company of only himself, Artemis could now do what he couldn't in front of someone else – hack into the school system. It was relatively easy, and in seconds he was waiting for the screen to load again. He stared out into the courtyard, and saw boys flicking stones, punching each other, shouting matches… Artemis almost shook his head in disgust. His parents honestly wanted him to mingle with _this_?

A small bell indicated that the screen had loaded. Artemis scrolled down to Dr. Po' s name, and clicked on 'Student Files'. Let's see what the quack was writing about him now… After his fairy memories had returned, Po had sensed a distinct change in Artemis. Artemis in return had acted the same as ever: rude, blunt, and still generally always right. After insisting that there was a change in his mood, Po had taken about five pages of notes on every word Artemis spoke.

Artemis clicked on 'Fowl'.

50 megabytes. Wow. That Po sure took his work seriously. Or perhaps he was just a bit paranoid. Artemis scrolled down to the recent months, and saw nothing new scrawled there. One sentence however, made Artemis pause. He stared incredulously at the screen.

_Artemis has a mental struggle with himself. He wants to show his more adolescent side but other pressures are pushing him to act oblivious to emotions and others. He must try harder to feel, to let his childish side come out a bit – a lot – more._

Artemis closed the screen. He did not have a childish side. What was that rubbish about 'a mental struggle'? That Po had lost his mind. He connected his emotional changes to his mental capabilities? That man had really lost his touch. What happened to the 'no respect' theory? Artemis glowered at the computer, wishing he had his laptop. At least his mother didn't sign him up for psychiatrist sessions this semester.

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_Police Plaza, Haven_

Holly had stridden all the way back to her office, empty handed, and a few coins poorer. Just as she sat back down onto her wheelie chair, the intercom crackled to life again.

"Captain Short, to my office, IMMEDIATELY!"

Holly took in the loud voice of Root, and decided that she was in for another yelling session. Sighing, she slid out of her chair again, tramping into the Commander's office. Root had his feet on his table, face the ordinary shadow of red-turning to purple, and a fungus cigar between his teeth. It seemed just about to fall into two pieces… Holly coughed, and fanned the smoke out of her face. Root acknowledged this by turning on the air purifier on his desk up by two notches. The machine whined.

"Short, pray tell what took you ten minutes to come to my office?"

Holly was about to reply when he continued, going on ahead over her.

"And, _pray tell_, why did it take a _second call_ to summon you?"

Holly gaped. So that was what the announcement was… ah well. No use crying over spilt milk.

"Well, I wasn't really… listening to the intercom." She muttered, head down.

"Oh, that would make sense."

There was silence for a minute, only the occasional puff of new smoke from Root breaking the silence, and the poor machine that had to deal with the colossal amount of noxious air from Root's cigar, whirring weakly, even though the setting was on high. After a bit, Holly decided to break the silence.

"Um, so what did you want, sir?"

"I want you to go talk to Foaly. He'll fill you in. Tell him to go invent a stronger air purifier too."

"Yes sir." Holly said seriously.

She exited, wondering what that was about. Why would Root call her, take so much time telling her off and then let her go? Holly rolled her eyes as she entered Foaly's lab. The answer to that was a bit obvious. It was because Root was acting like Root. Quick and easy, short and simple. That was Root…

"Ah, Holly."

Holly paused. She was already standing next to Foaly's screen, and the centaur was tapping the keys a bit in a lazy fashion.

"So, what does Root want?"

"Well, there's a new something. Something… odd. There's a new power source in Haven, but we've sent Retrieval and Root himself has gone down to inspect the place. Trouble too… and no one has found anything. Even my scanners just get nothing but static. Zilch."

"If Root can't even find anything then what do you want from me? I'm good, but not that good." Holly joked.

Foaly pulled a face. And a centaur pulling a face is something to see. He pulled up another screen, his thick fingers tapping a complicated password. Holly lost count when she heard his fingers hit the keyboard over fifty times. After half a minute, an info page came up. Holly recognized those blue eyes immediately.

"What are you doing with _him_?" Her voice was shocked.

"Well, Mud Boy was the only one I could think up that could build something to avoid my sensors and Root's." Foaly admitted. "It's not like it would be the first time…" he grimaced.

Holly grinned, overcoming her shock. "Well, what would it be? The… third time?"

This time Foaly scowled. "Don't push it Holly. Besides, I've been looking at his laptop, but he still keeps all his personal stuff on disk. I want you to go above and nab it for me, see if he's been up to anything suspicious." His teeth widened to a large smile, obviously thinking about Artemis' face if he found out that his laptop had been stolen.

Holly raised her eyebrow. "You think that Artemis would let me take his precious laptop?"

"Of course not, did you think that I was that stupid?" Foaly sounded miffed. "Arty's going on a little boarding school adventure and his laptop's been banned from his 'To Bring' list."

Holly snickered. She couldn't help it. It was funny. Artemis not getting his way… heh… she would've loved to see his face.

"Anyway, are you game?"

"Of course! What did you think?"

"I think that you would just take this opportunity to get yourself into more trouble; the type of trouble that you could only get into with that Mud Boy." Foaly said vaguely, turning back to the screen.

Holly decided not to reply. It would probably be true anyway. Foaly saw that.

"Holly, I don't think that this would be a good time to cross Root. You know how he's like when he's frustrated."

Holly knew what he was like. "Okay, I'll go quietly."

She walked out the door with her fingers crossed.

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_**AN:** There we go, Chapter One done. Not as long as my usual chapters, but I couldn't be bothered adding anything else :P I think it's long enough anyway. Not too much talking on Arty's side, so I'll do more of that next time. _

_xx Athemia_


	2. Contact Again

_**AN:** Here's a fairly long chapter to make up for my shorter Chapter before :) Enjoy. Also, I won't be updating in a while, because my exams are coming up, and I've been banned from the computer during that week. I'll post the third chapter as soon as I finished it though. I'm also enjoying writing this a lot more than I thought I would, so expect more chapters for this story :) _

_Also, during my exam week, I have been writing more. I've jumped ahead to chapter 5, and now I've written about four more chapters. I'm working on chapter four now, to join them all up. So no more long waits ;)_

_Thanks to all my reviewers. I wouldn't want to write all this if it weren't for you guys. _

_**Disclaimer:** Arty and Holly and Root and Foaly and Juliet and some of the settings belong to Eoin Colfer. The plot and extra characters belong to me. _

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**Chapter Two**

**Contact Again**

_St. Bartleby's, Ireland_

Artemis was trying very hard not to listen. It wasn't a very hard thing, if someone had a normal voice box. This particular teacher though, seemed to have approximately the same noise level and voice texture of a chainsaw. She screeched on and on, with Artemis mentally correcting her every sentence. The period had started just ten minutes ago, but he personally could not think of a reason why he was there at all. It was as if his mother had expected him to learn something from here…

His bitter train of thought however was interrupted when his name was screeched out.

"Mr. Fowl! Please tell me the answer to this question!"

Artemis turned his eyes from the window, and scanned the board. He had heard the question, but decided to play a game. It would make the day more interesting, at the least.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't listening."

The old teacher grew bug-eyed. Artemis had a sardonic smirk on his face as his teacher appeared to have an aneurysm.

"Why weren't you listening then, Mr. Fowl?" She screeched. It sounded like nails on a blackboard. Artemis guessed that she never won any singing talent quests when she was young.

"I already know this." He replied bluntly.

"Oh, do you? Perhaps you know the way to the principle's office as well."

"Sorry, don't know that." Artemis said, his eyes widening innocently. A look that did not look right on him, by the way.

"It's the fifth corridor to your right down the second corridor from here." She said through tight teeth. Artemis heard a distinct whistling noise.

Artemis stood up, walking to the door. When he made sure that no one was watching him, he veered towards the computer lab, slipping a piece of paper out of his pocket and scribbling a fake note on it, and forged a signature. He waved it to the supervising teacher, before sitting down on the computer that faced away from the teacher so that he couldn't see what he was doing. This was too easy.

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_Fowl Manor, Ireland_

Holly dipped into the thick, low hanging clouds, soaking herself in water before activating her shield. She circled lower, before landing lightly on the window sill of Artemis' bedroom. The closet door was hanging open, empty. So the boy was away then. Holly couldn't stop a smirk from flitting across her face before entering the lightly heated room, her Dragonfly wings hovering her slim frame a foot off the ground.

Holly came to the Mud Boy's desk, and rummaged around for all his disks. The metallic glint reflected against the wall, before Holly slipped them all into a little bag Foaly had supplied for her. She turned and unplugged the laptop, sagging under the weight. Her feet almost touched the floor. After strapping that to her Moonbelt, Holly looked around, and went back to Artemis' desk, pulling open the drawers and rummaging around.

After about five minutes, Holly found nothing, after searching the whole room. She dropped to the floor, walking over to sit on the neatly made bed. Sighing, she bounced lightly on the bed, wetting the sheets with the water she had soaked up from outside. It was so warm…

"Holly, you missed one."

Holly nearly had a stroke. She had forgotten about Foaly. She adjusted the mike.

"Erm, yeah. Where is it?"

Foaly's voice was amused. "It's under his pillow."

Holly removed one, two, three, four, five pillows, and saw a miniature golden CD case.

"Geeze, talk about comfort." She muttered, before cracking the case open. It was the same disk he had used to retrieve his fairy memories. Under his pillow… Holly shook her head. "We don't need this." She said into her mike.

"Ah, well, why don't pry a bit into Mud Boy's life when the opportunity arises?" Foaly asked smugly.

Holly shook her head. "You've been around me too long, pony boy." She teased, popping the miniature disk back into the case and tucked it into her pocket. She took one last look at the room before turning and flew out the window.

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_St. Bartleby's Ireland_

Artemis was sitting on an extremely uncomfortable wooden bench, the bleak sun doing nothing to warm his mood. Juliet stood next to him, arms crossed, her expression again startlingly not unlike his. They had two reasons to be annoyed however.

Juliet was annoyed because she had absolutely no fun anymore. Despite being almost twenty years old now, she still had those teenage tendencies, still was a fun loving girl. There wasn't anyone one of the female gender within a ten mile radius of her current position that wasn't over thirty years old, and she was personally feeling more than a little stifled by Artemis' firm behaviour. She was having a little trouble from restraining herself to challenge anyone she met of particular size or strength to a wrestling match. Artemis probably wouldn't have minded but then she'd probably go and get herself banned from the school grounds. You could just trip someone nowadays and be accused of assault…

Artemis was annoyed because he wanted to check something on his laptop. He had decided now that he wouldn't talk with anyone that didn't know where Mafeking was, which ruled out about ninety-nine percent of the people in the entire school, not including the Geography teachers. True, no one had paid any particular attention when their teacher was babbling on about South Africa, Artemis himself included, but it was no reason why they shouldn't know. All this just added to his irritation when Juliet and her stunning appearance kept drawing unwanted attention to him as well as Juliet. Artemis also registered the sour look on Juliet's face, but he saw his own discomfort on a rather larger scale than hers. Typically.

So, while the two of them fumed about their own problems, no one was particularly aware of a pair of black eyes that watched the two scowling figures from the outside.

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_Police Plaza, Haven_

Holly dumped the entire contents of her bag onto Foaly's desk, but snatched a tube from the table as it rolled out of her bag and threatened to capsize onto the floor. Foaly wasn't looking though, and Holly tucked it away in her pocket. She had just straightened up again when Foaly turned to load all of Fowl's disks onto his system. About fifty pages of notes flashed up onto his screen. Holly decided not to try and follow Foaly's reading after she had read her tenth ten-syllable word.

"Anything?"

Foaly murmured something, his eyes still dashing down the page as quick as he scrolled it. Holly waited less than patiently, her mind thinking about things like the few coins she had lost to that damn food machine. When Foaly closed the window however, her attention drifted back slowly to reality.

"So?"

"Oh, nothing too discriminating, I doubt that Arty even knows something's wrong down here."

"I doubt he does, since only two people I know so far know about _it_, whatever _it_ is." Holly said scathingly.

"Since when did Retrieval count as one person to you?"

"Well, I'm thinking that you didn't tell them what your suspicions were."

"And I told you?" Foaly asked, loading Artemis' mini disk onto the computer.

"No. That's why I'm guessing why you didn't tell them. You didn't tell me." Holly said, walking around to get a closer look at the computer.

"Since when did you get all smart?"

Holly decided not to reply, watching Foaly hack into the disk. She was a little more than curious to see what Artemis had told himself to trigger the memories. Not anything boring, surely. Artemis and boring were two words that didn't mix, except when he was lecturing people. That was the time that he only had Foaly's attention.

"Ah, Fowl, still haven't gotten over gold…" Foaly said.

Holly smirked as a long list of files came up. "Well, you really can't expect Artemis to forget about something as important as _gold_, now, can we?"

Foaly shot her a look out of the corner of his eye. "So, it is Artemis now, is it? Not Mud Whelp?"

"Oh, shut up and get on with it." Holly snapped, her good mood instantly disappearing. Foaly was so irritating.

"Oh, now you sound like Root. Honestly, why do people volunteer to spend time with that guy?" Foaly whined, clicking on the folder that said 'View Me First'.

An image of thirteen year old Artemis appeared on the screen. Holly sat back on a spare swivel chair.

"Now all I need is popcorn…"

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_St. Bartleby's, Ireland_

Juliet was using an unfortunately sapling as her punching bag. There was no room for a proper one in the car, and the gym teacher wouldn't let her use another one when she had demolished the first one. She gave the trunk a deft kick.

_Crack_

She sighed. Juliet moved on, leaving the poor tree snapped in half, foraging for another sprout. It was so _boring_… she found a tree, bigger than the previous few, but she needed something more stable. A few punched left her with shallow scrapes, but Juliet had long ago mastered how to control pain. The stinging barely registered. Another few kicks and the tree shook, groaning. Juliet was just about to see if she could crack this one in half when a voice behind her nearly made her jump out of her skin.

"You know, if the school finds these you'll be sued, thus, I'd have to pay for it."

Juliet turned to Artemis, whose pale skin seemed to glow in the dim light. He was leaning gingerly against a tree, no doubt thinking that it would ruin his suit. Juliet shrugged.

"Oh, and the cost of a few trees would damage your bank balance so severely that we would have to sell Fowl Manor?" She replied sarcastically.

Artemis leaned away from the trunk when he saw the spider scuttling down it. He brushed the non-existent dirt off his clothes, and turned his cool blue eyes on Juliet. It had taken her much practice to not flinch when he did that.

"Merely a fact, Juliet. No need to get all snippy about it." He said lightly.

"Why are you here then?"

Artemis scowled. "To get away from those bimbos that they call professional teachers. Honestly, you can lose brain cells by just listening to those idiots."

Juliet smiled. It was funny how Artemis put down everyone who tried to teach him something. She personally thought that Mr. and Mrs. Fowl should stop forcing tutors on Artemis before they get a law suit against them.

"Well you could always try to look like you're listening."

Artemis shot her a sour look. "And you could always _try_ to pretend you're having a great time here."

"This is different!" Juliet protested.

"Sure."

Juliet turned to the tree, wrapping her fingers around a branch, and ripped it off. Artemis watched her throw it away.

"What exactly are you trying to achieve by doing that?"

"It's called the Boring Factor. If you destroy a lot of things," Juliet ripped another branch off. The tree looked sad. "Then that means you're really bored. If you only destroy say, a single branch," She ripped off a foot thick branch, tossing it aside as soon as it had departed from the now bare trunk. "It means that you're not bored at all."

"Uh huh."

Artemis watched her slowly demolish the tree. _Well_, he thought, _at least she seems to be entertaining herself thoroughly. That's more that can be said for me._

"It's fun." Juliet said brightly, throwing another branch over her shoulder. Artemis leaned away slightly as it landed a meter away from him. Only Artemis and perhaps Butler would've been able to hear the thin layer of sarcasm in her voice.

Artemis turned to face the way he came and started walking away. Juliet watched him go, disgruntled. After throwing a few more vicious kicks at the tree, another loud _crack_ ran through the air and a huge fissure ran up the tree, leaving a gaping hole to let Juliet see the creepy crawlies that were scurrying frantically to find darkness again. She turned and followed the figure out of the trees.

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_Fowl Manor, Ireland_

Butler closed the door to the library, feather duster in hand. He walked to Artemis' bedroom, wanting to go somewhere where he could think about Artemis. He opened the door, and knew immediately that something was wrong. Artemis' bed, for one, was wet, and no one had been there to wet it. No one he knew of, at least. Butler advanced cautiously, ears perked. He noted the opened window, slightly open drawers with paper sticking out of them, but more importantly, Artemis' missing laptop.

Butler ran out of the room, his instincts telling him where to go. He opened the door to the security cameras, and selected all the tapes that recorded the room since Artemis had left. The first five showed the room empty. He froze them all a couple of times, but the image in the still-frame never changed. Butler started wondering if he was getting paranoid.

But finally, he saw what he was looking for on the twelfth tape. A very familiar elf, unshielded, by the way, shuffling through Artemis' things, taking every disk that she found. Butler watched the elf with increasing humor, before ejecting the tape when it had finished running, chuckling to himself.

He exited the room, a wide smile on his face, wondering what Holly would do when she found out that Artemis had planted fake disks over his room.

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_Police Plaza, Haven_

Holly and Foaly both watched the Artemis-on-the-screen. Nothing was said for a minute.

"You know, I don't think Mud Boy was right in the head when he recorded this." Holly muttered, tapping her foot impatiently.

Foaly was watching the screen, his eyes intent. Holly wondered what he was looking for. Suddenly the Artemis-on-the-screen's mouth opened.

"Holly, Foaly, thank you for trying to contact me, but I doubt that this would be the way I would prefer you to do it."

Holly stared at the screen, gaping.

"Next time, just call me on that communicator that you had so conveniently slipped me, since I'd rather you not go rummaging through my room again. Foaly should know how to do it."

Holly turned, and was about to ask if Foaly if this was all a joke, but Foaly's face was just as surprised as hers. The Artemis-on-the-screen continued talking, oblivious to the reactions of his audience, a smug smile on his face.

"And don't bother to return those other disks you took. I have the real copy stored away safely."

Then the screen went black.

Holly turned to Foaly, her face still surprised.

"How…?"

"That little weasel." Foaly muttered. Then he turned to Holly. "You gave Fowl a communicator?" he asked, eyebrows raised and a trace of a smirk on his face.

"Hey, it was nothing special or anything!" Holly said defensively.

Foaly snickered, and Holly resisted lashing out at him with her foot. Foaly saw the thought crossing her mind. He immediately looked wary.

"Don't take it too seriously Holly, I was only joking."

"Sure." Holly replied, miffed. "But the more important matter now is that now we don't have any of Fowl's stuff."

"Easy. You _just call him on that communicator that you had so conveniently slipped him_." Foaly mimicked, snickering again.

Holly raised her foot threateningly. Foaly struggled to keep his face straight.

"You do it, smarty pants." She replied grouchily.

Foaly locked the door, and secured the line before typing in a code. Holly told him the number, and he dialed it.

They waited.

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Artemis was in his room when the communicator started vibrating. His face showed a millisecond of surprise before settling back into his blank mask. He slipped the electronic gadget from his pocket, and flicked it on. Foaly's face flickered onto he small screen, and he saw Holly disgruntled face behind him. Artemis' face broke into a smirk. It was so entertaining to see Holly in a bad mood.

"So, Holly, I hope that you haven't messed up my room _too_ badly."

"Very good, Mud Whelp." She shot back, her voice slightly muffled.

"Anyway," Foaly cut in. He could sense another fight coming. Holly and Artemis could shoot insults at each other faster than he could understand them, and that was saying something. "We need some information."

Artemis smirked. He couldn't help it. "I figured. No one ever calls me just to say hello."

Foaly struggled on. "Well, yes. Um…"

"Have you done anything illegal lately?" Holly said bluntly.

Artemis pretended to think about it. "No, not lately… Why?"

"Oh, nothing. Bye, then."

"What?"

Foaly turned to look at Holly.

"You're about to believe that _Artemis Fowl_ hasn't done anything bad lately!"

"Illegal, Holly, not bad. Two different things." Artemis corrected.

"All the bad things you get up to are illegal." Holly snapped back.

"Okay, okay!" Foaly interrupted again. "Well, then Fowl-"

"Wait!"

Artemis turned the volume setting to mute, before putting the gadget back into his pocket. He had just gotten off the bed when a boy – Mark – opened the door. Artemis proceeded to walk on, ignoring him. Mark jutted out his shoulder, pushing Artemis back.

"So, computer freak, whatcha doing?"

Artemis folded his arms. One of his existing rules was to ignore anyone that talked to him in slang. 'Watcha' was _not_ a word.

"I'm talking to you, computer freak."

Artemis wondered when Mark would get tired of this 'computer freak' name.

"Hey!"

Mark pushed him roughly, and Artemis stumbled backwards. Almost immediately, Mark was slammed against the wall and Juliet had his arms pinned down, her eyes glittering dangerously. Artemis stood up, smoothing a crease that was in front of his shirt.

"I think that next time you should watch how you attempt to get my attention." Artemis said in a clipped voice.

Mark's eyes were wide as he watched Artemis walk out the door.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Police Plaza, Haven_

"I think that next time you should watch how you attempt to get my attention."

Holly rolled her eyes.

"Geeze, I don't think he'd get through one day alive if Juliet weren't there for him." She stated.

Foaly shrugged, leaning back in his specially modified wheelie chair.

"Well, a genius can hardly be expected to be a muscleman, can he?"

Holly smirked. "You're only siding with him so it gives you an excuse to not work out." She sniggered.

Foaly pursed his horsy lips. Just then the screen lit up again. Artemis' scowling face filled the screen, his sapphire eyes annoyed. Holly's mood grew noticeably happier. It was funny how when one of them was upset the other one of them was always happy. He seemed to be back in the forest, according to the dimmer light and the thickly nettled trees behind him.

"What's wrong, Mud Boy? Are there bullies at your school?" Holly mocked.

"Well, obviously. You, Holly, would get a much harder time dealing with them I think though."

"I have no problem defending myself, unlike some _people_." She said snippily.

"I wasn't talking about your fierceness, Holly. You have more than enough of that. I was talking about your size. Your height, to be more exact."

"Whatever." Holly said, miffed.

"You two seem to be unable to speak to each other for more than one minute without bickering so I think we're done here." Foaly said briskly, unlocking the doors.

"But we need his disk!" Holly protested.

"No you don't." Artemis said, watching Holly's face grow annoyed.

Foaly sighed. "You two, seriously-" he started saying.

He was cut off though, by Ark Sool storming in.

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_**AN:** Oooooh, cliffy :) I love writing cliffy's. Yes, I know I'm evil –evil laugh- I've found more and more that I love writing cliffy's, but I also know how it feels like to read them, so I won't write them too much :) see, I said I was nice, didn't I? Next chapter will have to wait until my exam week is over, and that's about a couple of weeks. You have been warned! Now, go review and I might update earlier ;) _

_xx Athemia _


	3. Missing in Action

_**AN: **Ah, the delights of controlling a cliffy. Yes, I have already previously registered that I'm evil x) hehe. I've merged Chapter four into this chapter, since I didn't really want to come up with like, 3000 words. I wrote for about ten minutes and I found that I had only written five hundred words, so… yeah :P Also, on a very happy note, I FINISHED MY EXAMS! –happy dance– ugh, the exams just hover over you like a death wish, and I just feel so happy after they finished… we all had a little party there's still two weeks of school to go though, all thanks to our 13 week long term. Ugh. _

_Okay, finish Author's note right now. Thanks again to my reviewers. I'll reply to you all! (or try to, at least).)_

_**Disclaimer:** Artemis belongs first and foremost to Eoin Colfer _

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**Chapter Three**

**Missing in Action**

_Police Plaza, Haven_

Foaly acted like a reflex. His fingers hit the 'Exit' button as soon as Sool's first word reached his horsy ears. The screen went blank.

"SHORT!"

Holly grimaced, her expression turning sour. Sool however, fortunately didn't see the screen, or more importantly, what was on the screen. She glanced at the centaur, who was now busily typing away, his head tucked to his chest. Only the elf would see the temporary relief shining through his eyes.

"Yes, Sool?" Holly asked, knowing that she would get another ear bashing for not using his proper 'title'. Holly mouthed the words Sool started shouting behind her.

"You do not refer to your superior officers without their proper titles!" He ranted.

"Okay, sorry sir." She said flatly.

Sool looked like was contemplating if he should give Holly a lecture about respecting her superiors or just get on with what he was going to tell her. He chose the latter.

"Where is Root?"

"I thought you just said we need to refer to our superior officers with their proper titles?" Holly asked innocently.

"Do not mess with me Short!" Sool bellowed.

Holly didn't flinch. She was too used to Root to be affected by what Sool said.

"I do not know the current whereabouts of _Commander_ Root." She said, emphasizing the word Commander so that Sool glowered at her.

"Foaly? I trust that you have been monitoring all travel?" Sool said, turning to the centaur.

"Well, _sir_, there are too many transport systems that all move at the same time, and often with the same frequency so it would be quite impossible to record all needed data right away, it would take a few minutes for me to sort through all the stored records, and after that I'll have to contact the security that was appointed at the time to confirm my results to their tallies as well-"

"Foaly, shut UP! Plain Gnommish! No jargon." Sool scowled.

Foaly continued. "Sir, I would be unable to speak to you even in Gnommish if you commanded me to shut up."

"Foaly, stop messing around! Just tell me if Root has gone anywhere!" Sool roared.

"No."

Sool glared at him. "That's it? You don't even need to check?"

Foaly turned back to the screen, and Holly saw the smug grin on the centaur's face. "If there was any new unscheduled transport going on my program would automatically send me an alert. I have received none since yesterday, when one of the tour buses broke down and ran late."

"Well, keep updating your program. We need to know if anything fishy is going on."

Holly started: "Sir, we do live underground-"

"Do I look like a complete imbecile to you Short? I am very aware of where we live!" Sool growled, cutting her off.

He didn't wait for an answer. Instead, he turned and stormed out. Foaly grinned at the equally grinning elf.

"And he didn't even cut your budget." Holly smirked.

"I wonder why he was asking about Root." Foaly mused, turning back to his computer. Then something seemed to hit him. "Ah, poor Arty, I bet he's wondering what's going on below…"

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_St. Bartleby's, Ireland_

Artemis was doing no such thing. He only worried, or perhaps a better word, thought over things that he did not fully understand. Considering that these things were very few, Artemis at the current time was not thinking about the abrupt disconnection. He had heard the familiar nasal voice of the fairy, and knew too well why he had been cut off.

Artemis trailed aimlessly back to his room. Life was so pointless at St. Bartleby's. At least at home he could reach things through his laptop. He smirked as he thought back to Holly's annoyed face. His laptop of course, was not the one she had so subtly snatched. That and all his disks were locked in a safe, whose location was known by only Artemis and Butler. Artemis kept only his most personal things in that safe.

When he had gotten bored of staring aimlessly at the stain on the wall of his room, Artemis wandered the small grounds. He should've been at his third class by now, but what use was going to his classes when he didn't learn anything? Besides, his teachers would probably be thanking God that he wasn't there, much less report him.

Artemis halted at the edge of the small tree 'plantation', contemplating if he should enter. He saw the dozen of sad looking broken saplings that Juliet had used as her little punching bags. The plants were all snapped in half, dangling precariously by a thin strip of bark that still held. He watched the wind buffet it this way and that, each time the bark shredding thinner and thinner. When the wind had cut through the final section, the piece of wood fell slowly to the earth, and the soft thud was muffled by a howl.

The wind picked up, before Artemis turned and walked back to the school. It loomed ahead of him like a prison sentence. He met Juliet on his way in, and she was just in the middle of practicing one of her moves on an arrogant adolescent.

"Juliet, you know that you're well on the way to be banned from the school." Artemis said lightly as he approached the frightened boy.

The blonde girl's head barely moved. "Oh, we're just having some fun Artemis. Aren't we, Rob?" She added cheerfully to the perspiring boy. Artemis noticed the poorly veiled threat in her voice, and he watched with amusement as the boy visibly gulped, and nodded weakly.

Artemis considered letting Juliet continue her vicarious fun. The boy seemed to be on the verge of tears though. He must've been at least eighteen.

"Juliet, there's a few trees outside that needs… breaking." Artemis said dryly.

Juliet held the boy for a bit longer, before loosening her hold on him. The boy almost stumbled in his haste to get away from her, tripping and almost falling flat on his face as he raced away. Juliet chuckled, and Artemis hid a small smile. Juliet had a sick sense of humor.

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_Police Plaza, Haven_

Holly was spinning around in her chair, cherishing the lack of work that that day had presented, when Ark Sool came storming in, again. Holly rolled her eyes. Will he ever stop annoying her?

"Any news on Root?"

"Why, _sir_?"

"PICK UP YOUR ACT SHORT! I AM YOUR SUPERIOR AND I WILL NOT APPRECIATE ANY MORE CHEEK FROM YOU!"

Holly was surprised that that was all it took for him to explode. Something seemed wrong.

"Why do you keep asking about Commander Root, sir?"

Sool cast Holly a scornful glance as he started walking out. "I thought that it would be a little obvious, Short, you being the smart girl you are." He sneered.

"Nope," Holly said cheerfully, ignoring the jibe. "That's Foaly's job."

Sool scowled heavily, before walking out the door. "Commander Root is missing."

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_St. Bartleby's, Ireland_

Artemis tapped his foot against the tiled floor, an unconscious nagging him. Over the past few days, he had the constant feeling like that he was being watched. Every time his head inched sideways, he could almost see something like a pair of lights winking out. It was slightly unnerving. Artemis had always hated it when something was happening to him and he couldn't explain it – this time included.

He questioned Juliet about his suspicions.

"Well, I didn't think that I needed to annoy you about something I'm not 100 sure about…"

"But you have had the feeling?" Artemis repeated impatiently.

Juliet nodded. Her eyes were serious for once.

"I get a feeling. It's not like the feeling when I get when you're watching me. It's like someone's aiming a gun at my back, not just watching. Weird, don't you think?"

"Not weird…" He murmured to himself.

Well, it wasn't. A lot people in the world had an excuse to try and kill him. Artemis would be the first to admit that fact. This was different though. "I think I'm going to have to talk to Foaly about it." He mused.

When Artemis got back to his room, he locked the door this time before trying to make a connection. It took a while. Either Foaly was not paying attention or something really big was going on underground. Since Foaly was always paying attention then Artemis guessed that something big was going on underground. He wondered briefly if he should start preparing himself for an unexpected journey.

_Well, it wouldn't be the first time, would it?_ He thought to himself.

But finally, he got through. Foaly's face flickered onto the screen, and he looked worn out.

"Hey, Fowl." He greeted tiredly.

"You look quite depleted Foaly." Artemis observed.

"Yeah, well, things have been really hectic around here lately." Foaly said vaguely, rubbing his fingers to get the circulation going. "What do you want?"

"Can you do me a favour?"

Foaly gaped at him in shock. "The great Artemis Fowl expects help from me?"

Artemis rolled his eyes. Well, he should've expected an answer like that. "Yes Foaly. It's nice to know that you think so highly of me." He replied scathingly.

"Well, as I said, we're pretty busy down here. What do you want exactly?"

"I just want a scan. I've got a feeling that someone's watching me. Juliet feels the same too."

Foaly didn't reply, but his fingers did a quick dance across the keyboard and the computer started humming. Artemis waited, inspecting his nails. He needed them manicured in a few weeks… But Foaly's expression diverted his train of thought.

"What did you find?"

"I think we need to chat."

Artemis suppressed a groan. "You have got to be kidding me."

"When do I joke with you, Mud Boy?"

Artemis registered the renewed use of the word 'mud'.

"True." He admitted. "Well, how do you propose that we 'chat'?"

"Well, the only way is probably if Holly comes up there…"

"You don't mean here, do you?"

"Fowl Manor, Mud Boy."

If Artemis was a normal teenage boy, he would've punched the air in victory. However, as many people know by now, Artemis is not an ordinary teenager. He permitted himself a vampire smile, making Foaly-on-the-screen look wary.

"You better not have anything planned Fowl."

Artemis pretended to be hurt. "You always expect the worst from me, Foaly." Then his face straightened. "I just didn't think that I'd be getting out of here this soon."

"Sure."

"Oh, one more thing... Do you have a plan to get me out of here or are you leaving that up to me?"

"Oh, you can manage it, Fowl. Surely kidnapping a fairy is harder than wagging school." Foaly said, winking at him before disconnecting.

Artemis frowned at the screen. He called Juliet then, and started packing his things. They were leaving.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Police Plaza, Haven_

Holly ran from office to office, trying to sort out who had called her first. As soon as she started a decent conversation with one fairy, another one would start bellowing her name. This was _confusing_… Suddenly, a metallic voice spoke.

"Captain Holly Short! Please report to the Ops Booth immediately."

Holly shook her head, now sprinting towards the Ops Booth. What did Foaly want now?

_I can't do this for much longer,_ Holly thought grimly as she confronted the solemn faced centaur. First Root goes missing, and no one even saw him leaving his office. They had no footage of Root leaving his office once he had entered it about five hours ago. Holly was feeling more than a little worried, but was prevented from doing anything unless it was answering to some fairy with a higher rank than hers. She couldn't wait till she got promoted. Holly's mind was brought back to earth however, by Foaly's next few words.

"Holly, we have a situation above ground."

Holly groaned. "Please, please, _please_ don't tell me that Artemis is going to be pulled into this."

Foaly almost looked sorry for her. He couldn't quite manage it though, letting a few snorts of laughter escape. "Sorry Holly, he is. Typical, eh?" He joked, trying to cheer her up.

"Great." Holly grumbled. "First Root and now the Mud Whelp. What does he want?"

"Well he contacted me a few minutes ago to ask for a scan. He felt like someone was following him."

"Big surprise." Holly muttered under her breath.

"Anyway," Foaly continued, "I found the same power source that was lurking down here tagging along with Fowl."

"What? Doesn't that just mean that he's setting all this up?" Holly asked.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. That's why you've got the special grant to go above to interrogate him."

"And get captured again? I don't think so." She snapped.

"I don't think Fowl would capture you." Foaly said, his eyes twinkling.

Holly squinted at him. "And what exactly is that supposed to mean, pony?"

"Oh, nothing." Foaly replied vaguely. "I just thought you'd like to have a chance to get away from all this and go visit our favourite Mud Boy."

"Favourite now, is he?" Holly asked, raising an eyebrow. "I'll go. I don't know where my head is anymore." She sighed.

"Poor Hollykins."

"Oh, shut up."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Fowl Manor, Ireland 

Artemis walked towards his room, and Juliet dumped his things onto the floor. Butler came rushing out, his face worried and a gun in hand.

"Artemis! Is everything okay?" Butler's large frame made the spacious hall seem suddenly smaller.

Artemis held up a hand, before continuing on his way to his room. "Everything is fine Butler. However, I doubt that they will stay that way for much longer."

Butler gave Juliet a confused look. His sister just shrugged. Artemis didn't make things much clearer for her either.

"All I know bro, is that we're going to get a visit from Holly soon."

Artemis went to his room after fetching his laptop and the disks he had hid from Foaly's search, before setting them up again in his room. It would take the fairies at least one hour to get there, so why not do a little probing himself?

Artemis combed the net for anything that could explain what was happening. He found a website, _Strange Happenings of the World_, and decided he would try it. What he read was not disappointing, even though it raised more questions rather than answer them.

_There have been few reports the last few decades about missing persons. When they turned up, the missing people have ranted about black eyes, games and a scavenger hunt. A lot of these people have been labeled as 'insane', but with growing numbers of these people that turn up and spout the same information, there are an increasing number of the general public that are starting to believe that what these people have claimed to have seen has actually happened. After being questioned more thoroughly, every missing person has given the same story, with almost the exact words. _

Artemis paused there, thinking. Well, he didn't know precisely _what_ was wrong. He had never seen any black eyes. He continued reading, not knowing if he should believe in all this or not.

After staring at the screen for what seemed like an age, Artemis felt his chair being pushed around. He almost fell over in shock, before he realized that he was staring into a pair of large hazel eyes. Holly stared back at him for a moment before cracking up.

"Oh, my, god… You should've seen the look on your face!" she gasped in between bales of laughter.

Artemis straightened, his expression dignified. "Well, what do you expect me to look like Captain? I can't be expected to greet you properly when you insist on creeping up on me like that." He replied indignantly.

Holly's laughter ceased slightly as she collapsed onto his bed, her small frame still trembled slightly as she rocked with laughter now and again.

"So, are you going to tell me what's going on?" he asked impatiently.

"Oh, that…" Holly immediately sobered up.

Artemis took in her change in mood. The elf had changed from being a carefree, laughing person to the captain guise that he knew so well. The elf crossed her legs on his bed, picking at a spot on her uniform. He waited patiently before Holly opened her mouth to speak.

"Root's missing." She mumbled.

Artemis raised an eyebrow. "And that two word sentence took you five minutes to sum up, did it?" he said scathingly.

Holly glared at him. "Well I expected an answer like that."

Artemis waited.

"How about you tell me what's going on in more detail?" he prompted, after Holly gave no impression that she was about to say anything soon.

It all came out in a rush. "There was an unexplained power source in Haven, and no one knew where it came from. Foaly, Recon and even Root went to see what it was but no one found anything, and we just left it. Then you came and Foaly did the scan, the power sources were exactly the same. Then Root went missing, and Foaly sorta connected everything together and here I am…" she trailed off.

Artemis didn't say anything. His mind was now analyzing the new information with things that he already knew – and nothing matched. He exhaled sharply, frustrated. Holly glanced at him, her fingers playing with a frayed edge of her uniform and a smile started playing at the edges of her cherubic lips. She loved seeing Artemis frustrated. It was only those times that he got to see that he didn't know everything.

"Well, it's all a bit vague, but what can we expect?" he finally murmured.

Holly interrupted. "Excuse me? Since when has this been a _we_? There was never a _we_, especially when you get involved in a _we_, everything gets twice as hard as it should be." She griped.

Artemis dropped his serious expression, smirking at Holly. "Oh, come now, Captain, who handles all this saving the world business better than we do?" he jibed, quoting Holly.

"No one." She replied reluctantly, but she smiled. Holly stared back at his deep blue eyes. She had never realized how blue they were. Most blue eyes had a greyish effect, but his were as blue as a polished sapphire, gleaming at her in the dim light of his table light.

Artemis in turn held her gaze. He never realized how pretty Holly's eyes seemed to be; there were golden flecks among the different shadows of brown, all blending together like an abstract painting. They seemed to be calling out to him, blazing fiercely, and for one second, on moment, Artemis saw behind that tough girl act, and saw Holly, the real Holly; the Holly that had always hidden away. Holly when she was vulnerable. Artemis didn't know if it was a good or bad thing that he knew that she did have that part of her.

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_Fowl Manor, Ireland_

Artemis had been talking to Foaly, since Holly had tuned out as soon as Foaly started boasting about his latest model of a tracking device. She had heard more than enough of that a long time ago. Artemis though, predictably, drank it all up.

"… so if Root is still wearing his, my computer can track him down even if he was in outer space." Foaly finished.

"But he's not showing up? What would that mean?"

"Two things. One, he's been taken out of our dimension. That's not really possible. Two, someone's taken off the tracker and just blew it to pieces. This one isn't that likely, because I had also sprayed everything that he was wearing with a solinium-base tracker, so unless the kidnapper – we are presuming it was a kidnapper, Root wouldn't exactly go waltzing off – made him change clothes and got rid of all his weaponry – keeping in mind he has the latex – there is no possible chance that we wouldn't be able to detect him."

Artemis turned to Holly, who was sitting on his bed, looking rather bored.

"So, Captain, got anything to add?"

Holly didn't even look his way. She was examining an interesting blotch of brown on the brown painting. "Nope,"

"Thanks for your input." He shot at her. "Foaly, what are the possibilities that Root can be in another world?"

"About ten million to one at an average guess."

"But it is possible?"

Foaly shrugged. "Well since I haven't even thought of a way to make that happen and my technology is the best under and above the world, that isn't such a good option either." Foaly said, slightly sheepish.

Artemis rubbed his temples. "Did you get another lead on that power source?"

Foaly shook his head. "It hasn't moved half a millimeter, but there's still nothing there. It's grown now, on the screen it's about half a centimeter in diameter. In real life it would have to be at least ten meters long. But it moves on the spot, like its pulsing."

Artemis looked at Foaly straight in the eye. Foaly saw the burning determination, and was reminded forcefully of Holly. He knew that what Artemis was about to say next, he wouldn't like it.

"I need to come to Haven."

Foaly didn't like it.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Alleyway, Lower Elements_

Artemis approached the area, Holly at his side. Foaly's gadgets had malfunctioned all of a sudden, but they had both agreed that they didn't need to go back. They were only looking around, after all. If Recon and Root had come here and found nothing, what would they find? A little part of Artemis though, wanted to find something that would highlight, make more interesting, his now slightly boring life. He needed something to take his mind off things.

Holly stopped in a corner. "The last time I came here, this was the exact place that the power source was. Foal said that it didn't move, so it should still be here."

"And it's such a smart move, isn't it, that you are standing right in it?" Artemis said sarcastically.

Holly scowled at him, but moved away. Suddenly, a wave of dizziness hit her like a ton of bricks.

"Ugh…"

Holly swayed on the spot, before collapsing. Artemis ran to her, a surge of worry rushing through him as he pulled her upright.

"Holly? Holly? Are you alright?"

He saw three blue sparks sinking into her head. After a minute, Holly's eyes fluttered open. The first thing she saw was two huge blue eyes staring at her, filled with worry.

"Artemis…" She groaned, sitting up and rubbing her eyes. "What was that?"

"You just… fainted."

Holly shook her head, blinking rapidly, staring at something over Artemis' shoulder. "Please tell me that I'm dreaming."

Artemis turned. A light mist had begun to collect, except that it was concentrated in one area. It slowly darkened in colour, until a half way solid shape appeared, and it continued to gather wisps of mist like threads. Artemis stared.

"What the…"

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_**AN:** Oh, this chapter was fun at the start and I couldn't resist writing a cliffy. The next two chapters will show you people the plot. I've already planned most of this out. There's going to be at least 30 chapters in total, depending on how long I want to drag it out. I must confess that writing Arty fan fics are really interesting. You kinda imagine yourself in that scene… Anyway, next chapter coming. I'm just running it through a few more grammar and spelling checks, before I'll post it. After the next two chapters, I'll be getting onto the plot :) _

_xx Athemia _


	4. A Superior Monkey

_**AN:** Okay, this Chapter was pretty good I think. I won't babble, but thank you to my reviewers, this story exists because of you! _

_**Disclaimer:** All characters and most settings belong to Eoin Colfer. The rest of the unclaimed genius belongs to me :D_

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**Chapter Four**

**A Superior Monkey**

_A dark alleyway, Lower Elements_

Artemis and Holly stared at the… thing. Artemis would usually give the things he saw a clearer description, but that was all he could do at the time. The colour, he couldn't describe too well either. It was like a colour light at the end of a dark tunnel: very faint, and you can just make it out by squinting a little. This light though, whenever you thought you saw the colour, it would change, and you would have to start with the guessing all over again. It had two black eyes, like a black diamond, twinkling in a menacing way amidst the floating haze.

The shape was just like a droplet of water. Round-ish and wobbling slightly as it hovered at Artemis' head height (which meant Holly was bending her head a little to gape at it). The two were thinking about two things. Artemis' mind was furiously analyzing the… blob's movements and what he thought it would be made out of and the texture and its mental capability, while Holly's head was just repeating the same thing over and over again. Something she so kindly voiced out loud for Artemis.

"What the _hell_ is _that_?"

Artemis was about to reply, when the blob answered for him.

"I would rather it if you did not use such improper language in front of me, thank you. I am not a 'that', I am a superior being. Superior to you, fairies, and also, obviously, superior to you, human…"

Artemis looked at the blob with amusement, not really surprised by the fact that it could speak. If it could kidnap a fairy armed to the teeth with deluxe fairy technology, a complexion that could practically burn and with an attitude to boot, than it could at least communicate properly… "Then why don't you have a superior form?"

The blob revolved, laying its glittering black eyes on Artemis, whose deep blue eyes contrasted with the black as the two started at each other unflinchingly. It would be hard for a floating blob to flinch though.

"If you spared one second to stop think, Fowl, you would see that there is more to the mind than the outer image."

"Now it sounds like you." Holly snickered.

The blob revolved again.

"As I said, _miss_, I am not an '_it'_. I am a-"

"Superior being, yes, we heard all that." Artemis said impatiently. "Do you have a name?"

"I do not sink to the petty level of needing someone to call me through speech." The blob said haughtily.

"Well, sorry, I cannot use telepathy." Artemis replied blandly.

"That is why I referred to myself as superior to humans." The blob continued to say, still haughtily. If it had arms it would've crossed them.

Holly rolled her eyes. "Okay, I changed my mind. I like you better." She paused after she said those words, thinking that maybe he would take it too literally.

Artemis was silent for a moment, wondering how he should react to such a comment, but spoke to the blob instead. "So since you are so superior to us, then you should be able to accept the fact that we need something to think of you as, unless you just want to be called 'blob'?"

The blob seemed to think about it for a minute. Its monotone voice had stopping vibrating the air around them, and Holly fidgeted. Artemis watched her, amused. She did act her size then. Holly found those blue eyes staring at her, and she grew slightly uncomfortable as the silence stretched on. At this moment though, the to-be-named blob spoke.

"You may call me Rafiki."

Artemis raised an eyebrow. "Rafiki? Are you serious? Is that really what _such_ a superior being would be chosen to be named?"

"I liked the Lion King! Besides, all those animals are so stupid. Rafiki was the only one with sense."

Artemis rolled his eyes. The all-knowing, superior blob wants to name himself after a child's cartoon show. Great. Just great. If he was supposed to be superior to everyone, Artemis shuddered to think what the rest of the world would act like.

"Okay then, Rafiki." Holly said, obviously trying to smother a smirk. "What do you want? Why are you here?"

"I very much doubt, Holly, that he would tell us so straight forwardly." Artemis commented.

"Oh, and asking would be _so_ wrong, wouldn't it?" she snapped back.

The self-named blob called Rafiki sighed. "Will you two take a break from harassing each other for one second, so I can answer the red head's question?"

Holly set her mouth, folding her arms. Artemis was so _annoying_. Rafiki continued.

"I have been watching you all," he began. Artemis cut him off.

"Us all? You mean, you've been the one watching me? And Juliet?"

The black eyes stared at him coldly. "I thought that you were supposed to be a genius?"

Artemis crossed his arms. Now he and Holly had the same posture. "I am a genius. I'm just confirming a new fact." He shot back.

The black eyes turned amused. It was hard to describe, but Holly thought it was the look that Root got when he was about to punish someone, or like Mulch when he had been told to lie on his stomach during an arrest.

"Oh, sure then, _it is confirmed_. Shall I continue to talk like a computer now, shall I?"

"Sure. You'll probably manage it too, since you're so _superior_." Artemis smirked.

Holly couldn't help smiling. It was annoying when you were the one being annoyed by Artemis, but it was another thing to be the one watching Artemis annoy someone. The black eyes were now cold, but so were Artemis' blue ones. She stared at the two. More specifically though, she stared at Artemis. He had his don't-try-to-prove-me-wrong stance, and the blob… was just a blob. The black eyes flickered to her for a moment. Then it spoke again.

"You do know, elf, you are the first fairy in the entire history to ever fall in love with a Mud Man that the fairy population at large still thinks of as an enemy. Actually, Mud Boy; he's about one-fifth your age you know. Compared to human status, you should be extremely wrinkly and have white hair right about now and sitting in your rocking chair, not parading about with public enemy number one in _such_ a _daring_ adventure."

"I am not in love with him." She muttered, too shocked by what it had said to react normally. Artemis turned his head slightly at her murmured words, but he didn't seem to make out what they were. Alternatively, perhaps that he thought he was being delusional.

"Course you are. I can tell, especially the way you two are always fighting. Then he'll say something, you'll stop, and you two gaze at each other for about an eternity. Romantic, don't you think?" Rafiki said.

Holly gaped. She turned quickly to gauge Artemis' reaction to these words, but he was still staring at the blob, his expression blank as ever, arms still crossed. Holly was confused, but the blob spoke again.

"Honestly fairy, you are so thick."

"Excuse me!"

Artemis turned to look at her, his blank expression flickering. Holly quickly conjured up a _very_ complex story.

"I wasn't talking to you."

"I do hope that you're not about to go deranged on me Holly." Artemis commented lightly, the corners of his lips tilting upwards.

Holly opened her mouth to snap back, but the voice spoke.

"Here you two go again."

Artemis didn't seem to hear.

_You're using telepathy, aren't you?_ Holly thought.

"Oh, you're very good, aren't you? So quick on the uptake…" Rafiki said sarcastically.

_You get better at showing your emotions every second. It's so nice to see that you're opening up, Rafiki,_ Holly thought, equally sarcastic.

Artemis on the other hand, had no idea that Rafiki was conversing with Holly, even though his own mind was now filled with Rafiki's monotone voice.

"So, Mud Boy, what do you really think of the Captain over here?"

_If you're more superior to a fairy, it means you're not a fairy, so why are you still calling me Mud Boy?_ Artemis thought, irritated.

"Because, I think it's a title you deserve more than human."

_Oh, that's nice,_ he thought.

"No, I am not nice, especially towards mud like you. I am merely stating the truth, and you know it. You feel like that too, especially around this Miss here showing you what an _honorable _person would do."

_You have no idea what you're on about._ Artemis thought coldly.

"Of course I do. That's why I call myself superior. I can analyze people even without seeing their thoughts."

_Well, good for you. Call yourself anything you want you'll still be blob to me._ Artemis thought snidely.

"See, this is why I call you mud. That fairy over there isn't calling me names. She's actually talking to me about my emotions. Now, isn't that nice?"

_Yeah, that's Holly all right._ Artemis thought dryly. Talking emotions to a blob… She was out of her mind.

At that moment, Rafiki withdrew.

"You both are quite interesting." Rafiki commented.

Artemis glowered. Holly saw his face and knew that Rafiki had been talking… ah, thinking to Artemis as well. The sour expression on the Mud Boy's face lifted her mood by quite a lot. She was quiet though, trying not to think about what Rafiki had just said to her. She did not even like Fowl, much less love him! It didn't matter how superior Rafiki said he was; he was wrong about that. Holly knew that she didn't love him. She knew her emotions, and when she thought about Fowl, 'love' wasn't even in sight on the list. 'Like' was slowly making its way there. Rafiki was just insane…

"Holly?"

She snapped out of her thoughts, and found Artemis staring at her, a rather cautious expression on his face, but his eyes were amused.

"What?"

"Are you sure that you haven't signed up for any psychiatrist sessions lately?"

"You know very well that I don't need them." She snapped.

Artemis still stared at her, and she felt herself growing oddly embarrassed under his blue gaze. Rafiki spoke up.

"_Hem, hem._ Are you two quite done there?"

Artemis jerked, turned his eyes away. Holly did so too, but a light blush appeared on her cheeks. Artemis appeared as indifferent as ever, but he was a little shaken inside.

What was _that_?

"You are discovering the power of emotions." Rafiki told him tonelessly.

Artemis looked up, outraged, but saw that Holly wasn't even looking at him. That was okay then. He fumed quietly.

"Oh, this is funny. Artemis Fowl, cold, pitiless Artemis Fowl, is falling in love!"

"No I'm not." Artemis snapped.

This time Holly looked at him. "I don't think that it's me that needs those psychiatrist sessions." She jibed.

Artemis scowled. "So, _Rafiki_, what do you want with us?"

"I want you two to rescue the world, once again. You do it so well." Rafiki said cheerfully.

Holly didn't like the sound of this. "What do you mean, rescue the world?" she replied, her voice brittle.

"Well, perhaps not his world." Rafiki said, tilting his (or its?) eyes at Artemis. "More yours,"

Holly was in shock. Artemis took over the interrogation. "Why only hers and not mine?"

The black eyes turned to Artemis. "You sound like you'd like to wipe out your race, Mud Boy."

"I don't. I need to clarify why Holly's world and not mine too."

Holly thought she heard a protective note in his voice, but she got rid of that thought quickly. Artemis, protective? No _way_.

"Well, I don't think that I want to give you that piece of information right now." Rafiki said briskly. "I'd rather you start perspiring over the fact that the fate of – Holly, did you say? – Holly's world."

Holly wasn't exactly perspiring, but she was more than a little worried. Artemis turned his nose up at the word. He never perspired. The only time was when Juliet and Butler ganged up on him, forcing him onto one of those… treadmills. Those stupid things fall apart so easily, Artemis thought critically. On the other hand, maybe it was because Butler was attempting a sprint on it…

"Now, as you both know, the infamous Julius Root is missing. I happen to know where he is- "

"Yeah, maybe because you were the one to make him go missing," Holly hissed.

"– And if I were a nice person -"

"Yeah, sure, you're a person. A _very_ nice one, too," Artemis muttered. His voice was layered with sarcasm.

"– I would tell you where he is right now -"

"Because that would be so nice of you, wouldn't it? Kidnapping him and then give him back again. Sure, I'll consider you doing that." Holly griped.

"– but since you two are uttering insults at me with every sentence I speak, I'd rather you do something for me first."

"Are you done now? I'm going to be late for a check in." Artemis said in a bored tone.

"No I am not finished." Rafiki snapped. "You two are going to go through a series of places, and when you complete the tasks I set you then I may tell you where Commander Root is."

"What tasks?"

"Wait, Holly. I'm not going on some psychotic game if we _may_ get Root back. It's a yes or no, not maybe, not perhaps." Artemis scowled.

"Very good Mud Boy. You're lucky that _Artemis_ was here to help you, fairy." If the blob had a mouth, Artemis would've sworn he was smirking.

Holly didn't reply. Her face darkened. Artemis smothered a smirk himself. Then Rafiki spoke.

"I swear that if you complete my tasks then I will reveal Root's location to you."

Holly had started to nod her head, but Artemis still shook his head. "Please be more precise. You will give Root back to us, not show us his location. The Commander must also be in perfect condition, original, alive, and not harmed or altered in any way."

Rafiki evidently scowled. "Quite precise, aren't you Mud Boy?"

Artemis knew by that that he had covered everything.

"What do you mean 'original'?" Holly asked.

"Well, cloning technology hasn't developed much on earth and below it, but I'm guessing that Rafiki here is so _superior_, that we may have been given a duplicate. Or even worse, perhaps even an imposter." Artemis said, his voice growing smugger as he watched the black eyes glitter darkly.

"So, _Rafiki_, do you swear that we will get Root back? Under all my conditions?"

"I swear that you will get Root back, under all your stupid conditions." The monotone voice said, but Artemis detected a faint edge of frustration.

"Fantastic." Holly said, feeling a bit left out. "Now what?"

"You begin."

"But you haven't told us what we are to do!" Artemis protested.

Holly swore those eyes were smiling at her. "Well that's too bad then."

The world around them blurred, like swirling paint, and Holly felt a sudden wild wind begin tearing at her elfin frame.

"Artemis!"

The wind snatched at her words, but Artemis heard them. He was human enough to feel surprised at Holly's panicky voice, but he called back without commenting.

"I'm here Holly, right here…"

Artemis tried to sound calm. Holly sounded a bit too stressed to take on that particular role right now. Then the corners of Artemis' eyes were going black. Their surroundings were now bleak; swirling so fast that it seemed like a total grey. The black bits at the edges of his sight grew, but Artemis reached out blindly.

Holly was having a lot more trouble standing upright, her frame being smaller than Artemis' was. She thought about being blown away. She tried pushing down her rising panic. She drew in air with ragged breaths.

"Artemis! Where are you?"

Artemis was now genuinely surprised especially when he started to panic at her voice. Holly sounded like she was pleading. Artemis stumbled as he tried to take a step, so he decided to keep his feet planted firmly on the ground. Well, as firm as he could manage. Holly wasn't standing that far away from him, surely?

"Right here Holly, calm down!" The words might've been soothing if he weren't shouting them.

Calm? Holly thought hysterically. She was about to be lifted off her bloody feet and he wanted her to be calm? He had to be kidding. She tried moving her feet, but as soon as the sole of her foot rose an inch, she felt herself fluttering into the wind. That wasn't a good idea. She tried shuffling her feet. Slow progress, but she stayed earthbound. Just as the wind picked up, she felt another pair of hands reaching for her. _This better be that Mud Boy,_ she thought grimly, holding on tightly. The wind buffeted her, and Holly felt her legs give way as she got pushed sideways, hitting someone. She saw the navy blue material. Her last thought was 'So it is Artemis' before her mind shut down.

---

The wind picked up, and Artemis felt himself growing faint. It was getting harder to draw breath. His hands were still held in mid air and starting to feel stiff, but the blackness was now covering his sight. Artemis thought he felt a pair of hands wrap themselves around his own, he thought he saw and a flash of auburn, but the next minute he felt nothing.

------------------------------------------------------------

_Limbo, Nowhere_

When Artemis came to, he felt a thudding pain in his head. It was like a particularly rough headache, only this time it was more persistent and he didn't have any medicine nearby to soothe the pain. He glanced around blearily. It seemed like that they were in some kind of hut. Clay walls, crumbling, dirt floor, straw roof, and one bed with a patchwork quilt that already had many holes in it and about ten centimeters from the floor. A wooden table crudely crafted, with a little mirror on a stand and a wax candle that had about a five-minute's use left and a little wooden stool that probably Holly wouldn't even be able to sit on comfortably. Artemis tried moving, but pain shot up his arm.

"Ow."

Artemis tried moving his body without the use of his arm. That wasn't too easy either. His watering eyes fell on the still unconscious form of Holly, lying across his lap and effectively pinning him down. Unless he wanted to move her of course… Artemis blinked the water out of his eyes, raising one hand.

"Holly. Holly, are you okay?"

Nothing... Her heart was beating, breathing even. She just wasn't opening her eyes. If Artemis didn't know better, he'd think that she was sleeping. Her eyes moved under her eyelids. Dreaming too, he thought dryly. He let his hand fall, and it slid through her hair. He had never realized how long it had grown. The fast fading sunlight touched it, beams of orange and pink highlighting the dust motes in the air, sending soft streaks of yellow through the auburn locks. She looked so peaceful… Then her eyes snapped open.

"What?"

Holly sat bolt upright, and unfortunately, Artemis' head was still bent over her. No need to say, it was quickly withdrawn. Holly looked up into Artemis' eyes, that were watering _again_, and he had a disgruntled expression on his face.

"You know Holly, you generally don't hurt people when you're pinning them down at the same time."

Holly looked down. She was still sitting in his lap. The normal Holly would've leapt out immediately, and perhaps she would even punched him to make herself feel better, but the current Holly tried leaping and immediately felt light headed again. She prevented herself from falling over by flopping onto the small bed, which moaned, even under her slight weight.

"What was that!" she groaned, rotating her shoulders.

Artemis shrugged, even though Holly was staring at the ceiling and she wouldn't see the gesture. He got gingerly to his feet, knowing that he wasn't about to try any leaping anytime soon. He just happened to look out the window. His mind tried and rejected any logical explanation to what he was seeing. Holly's voice shook him out of his sudden confusion.

"So?"

"So what?" Artemis said bitterly. He tore his eyes away from the window and eyed the chair apprehensively. It looked barely stable enough to hold up a pillow, much less an actual person.

Holly looked up from her position. "So, genius, where are we?"

"Take a look." Artemis said in a patronizing voice, waving his hand at the window.

"What's wrong with you telling me?"

"Because you'll assume that I'm lying."

"And you know that because…"

"You know Holly, if you went to see what was out the window, we wouldn't be having this conversation right now."

Holly glared at him, before getting to her feet and hobbling over to the window. That Rafiki never mentioned actual bodily harm… However, all thought of harm flew out the window (not literally) when Holly saw what was outside.

Actually, what she _didn't_ see outside.

"Yes, I thought so too." Artemis drawled. "I mean, if we're going to be placed in limbo, why does it have to be this uncomfortable? I doubt that I have anywhere to sit but the floor. For all his superiority Rafiki does not know the meaning of comfort."

"And comfort is so important, isn't it," Holly said, her voice controlled, but still an octave higher, "When you're floating in mid air?"

"Well, Rafiki might've thought that we wanted to know how he feels when he floats in mid air." Artemis said, his tone still bored.

Holly squinted at him. "You seem extremely calm, Mud Boy."

Artemis shrugged, sitting back down on the floor. "Well, what's there to gain from throwing a fit? No thanks, I'd rather keep my head in times like these."

Holly crossed her arms; her eyes gazed out the window. It was as beautiful as it was scary. It was like the night sky, almost like they were floating in space. It was just blackness, total blackness, but with millions of small lights, twinkling, so close that you think that you can touch it but every time you step forwards the light steps back. It felt like being inside a rainbow. All these lights surrounded you, but none of them were touchable. Multi coloured, each one winked at her when she laid eyes on them for more than five seconds. Holly reached out a hand, but of course, felt nothing. She turned back to Artemis, who was watching her carefully.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Artemis turned away, and went to light the candle on the table without burning the table itself. He was thinking that how different Holly looked. Yes, she was still in her LEP uniform, but she looked like a little child just then, discovering the wonders of a new toy that had capabilities beyond her wildest imagination. All the florescent lights twinkling around her like a million fireworks that refused to go out, what little light there was reflecting in her hazel eyes. If Holly really were a child, he would probably say it looked 'cute'. However, Holly, being her age, she just looked… magical. Artemis shook these thoughts out of his mind.

"So, Rafiki, what do you want with us?" he called out.

Holly spun around. "What? Where is he?"

Artemis rolled his eyes. "Well, don't you think that since he was the one that placed us in… this, he would be able to hear us?"

Holly didn't reply. Her eyes widened. Artemis turned to see what she was looking at. The mirror was fogging up, and words were slowly being traced onto it. He rolled his eyes. He guessed that Rafiki had seen one too many human movies and it was going to his head.

"You know, speech would be a lot quicker, seeing how small that mirror is." He commented.

Nevertheless, the words didn't stop, even though Artemis saw the writing hesitate a little. He smirked, but read it anyway.

_Fairy and Mud Boy…_

_Since you both seem to have given up fighting each other, I have decided to set you your task. There was one thing that I forgot to mention, and that was how long that my tasks were going to take._

Artemis groaned. Holly would've been happy if it didn't mean that she would probably be stuck in limbo for eternity.

However, the rules say that I must play fair. So I will give you each seven tasks, the next one will be revealed to you as soon as you succeed the first. However, if you fail and you are still not dead, you will have to stay here forever. It's a pretty good offer, since if you didn't accept you'd be dead anyway. So, first task. I would like you to get me a pea. You have three wishes that you can use for all seven tasks. If I were you, I'd choose carefully…

Artemis shook his head. Three wishes? It should at least be seven. However, it was hard to argue with someone that you couldn't see. He thought about it. What would be needed? Also, the slightly less analytic part of his mind was amazed that someone could fit so much writing in such a small space.

"Must we use all our wishes now? Are they rule-free wishes? Is it three each or three to share between us?" He asked the room at random.

The mirror fogged up again.

Yes, three rules free wishes for each of you. Rule free and you must use them all now.

Artemis smirked. All he needed to know was if it was rule free. He saw Holly thinking deeply. He already knew what he was going to wish for.

Holly on the other hand, was wondering exactly what she should wish for. She didn't even know the tasks set ahead for her.

"What kind of tasks will we face?" she asked.

I cannot tell you that.

Holly scowled. Then Artemis spoke up.

"I suggest that you wish for a human appearance."

"What, and stay that way forever? No thanks." She snapped.

Artemis stared at her. "I have an idea."

Holly didn't want to, but she couldn't help but believe him. She bit her lip, but nodded. Well, that was one wish. How about the other two though? She'd need Foaly's gadgets, that's for sure. That was two. One more then… An unlimited, and an inconspicuous supply of acorns. She smirked. There was no way that she'd be going anywhere without her magic.

"Okay, I have three."

Artemis turned to the mirror.

Speak it out loud.

Artemis gestured to Holly that she should start first. Holly tried to make her speech sound loophole proof.

"One, I wish for an attractive human form." She smirked at Artemis. "Two, I wish for my choice of all of Foaly's gadgets, and they work properly. Three, I wish for an unlimited, and an inconspicuous supply of acorns."

So be it.

About ten dozen small pockets appeared, each one carrying an acorn shaped bulge. Also, a wide selection of Foaly's gadgets beeped, whirred and hummed. Artemis then turned his head, and stared at the rapidly transforming Holly. First, her skin grew paler, until she had a creamy complexion. Her hair grew longer, sleeker, and she grew larger in general, and about Artemis' size. Holly smiled at her reflection, but she walked across the room and placed her hand over the burning candle. Artemis stared, but saw the blue sparks playing across her now human sized hand.

"Just a test." She murmured. Her voice didn't change, at least.

Artemis cleared his throat, his stare replaced with an even wider smirk on his face. Holly peered at him suspiciously. The Mud Boy had something planned, all right.

"One. I wish for us to go into each new task completely refreshed and healthy and whole." Holly looked at him, stunned. He'd actually thought of their wellbeing? "Two. I wish that I can use my wishes whenever I want, even during the tasks, and when we get back to the real world."

Clever, Holly thought. But then again, when wasn't he? She also noted that he had said _when_, not _if_.

"Three, I wish for ten more wishes."

There was silence for a whole minute. Holly stared at the mirror. She was scared that his wishes would be rejected, but also hopeful, because then they'd have no trouble with the tasks whatsoever if he was able to make those wishes. When the writing came, it was jagged.

So be it.

Artemis smirked. Holly laughed, finally feeling as if something was going right that day. Well, being trapped in limbo wasn't exactly her idea of a good day, but if Artemis had ten extra wishes and could also wish for more anytime he wanted, it wouldn't turn out that bad. She walked over to the pile of beeping machines, and started strapping things on, and threw a couple of things at Artemis, who caught them. Barely.

Holly looked at Artemis, who, in return was looking at her. She tried to hide her smile. "So, shows to see that you can do at least one thing right, doesn't it?" she jibed.

"Only one thing?" he protested, strapping the something that looked like a bracelet on his arm.

"Well, if you're expecting more praise then don't hold your breath."

At that, Artemis actually smiled. Not the I-just-outsmarted-you-and-I'm-going-to-take-over-the-world smile, but the smile that Holly never knew he was capable of doing. A more kind of we'll-get-through-this smile. Hmm. It just goes to show that you actually do learn something new everyday.

Suddenly, a door appeared. Artemis and Holly both turned to the mirror. It said two words.

Good luck.

Holly went, reaching out for the doorknob. She opened it and a blaring white light exploded, blinding them both effectively. Artemis reflexively shot up his hands to protect his eyes from the glare, and another wind shot through the door. What is it with that thing and wind? Artemis thought resentfully, before he was dragged out of the door as easily as if the wind had hands and Butler's strength. The last feeling he had was of leaping into nothingness, with Holly at his side.

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_**AN:** Weee! Plot is starting:) You'll probably notice as well that I'm writing about Artemis… older than an 16-year-old-Artemis would act.I just think that him being a little older right now will suit the story. So he is now officially 17 :-P let's just say he spent his 17th birthday unconcious in limbo. LoL. _

_Please review, I'll post faster if you do ;) Next chapter up when I get reviews… -evil laugh-_

_xx Athemia_


	5. First Task

_**AN: **Okay, I know that I haven't been updating, but it's cause all my chapters that I had ready was on my USB, and um… it snapped in half. So, I had to start again. Ugh… the only good thing was that I had another copy of the chapter… somewhere… here… Okay, I'll stop talking (typing, whatever). Here's the story. _

_**Disclaimer: **Nothing belongs to me except for Rafiki and the plot._

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Chapter Five**

**First Task**

_Small Town outside a Castle _

Artemis awoke once again with a thumping headache. Grumbling, he dragged himself to his feet, and looked around for Holly. She was no where to be seen. Artemis jumped to his feet in alarm, glad to not to feel any light-headedness as he examined his surroundings.

He seemed to be facing a wooden wall, and underfoot was a patch of lush green grass. He turned and saw wide green meadows, rolling across the landscape, a few trees and pastures with cattle and sheep grazing, all bathed in the soft yellow glow of a morning sun.

Morning? Artemis wondered how long he had been out. Rubbing his temples, Artemis debated if he should walk to the other side of wall or not. The wall didn't have any holes that he could see through, so if all his enemies were on the other side of the all and holding laser guns, he wouldn't know. Artemis decided to walk around the corner. He wasn't feeling particularly suicidal, but Holly might be on the other side.

He walked around, and bumped into someone. His hands shot out immediately and steadied himself, clutching the shoulders of the person that he had bumped into.

"Oh, hi Holly."

"Hi to you too. Next time I just need the hi, not the blow."

Holly brushed his hands off her and she walked away a few steps. Artemis gazed at the scene in front of him. He seemed to be in a village. There were people that cast him strange looks as they shuffled by with their shopping baskets that were filled with everything from raw fish to open clay bowls of spices. Artemis guessed that they had been sent to some middle age village. He turned back to Holly.

"So, do you know where we are?"

"Oh, the great Artemis Fowl doesn't know where we are?" Holly said, faking surprise in her voice.

"Oh, and you can faint if you want." Artemis said sarcastically.

Holly smiled, and walked to the wall, before slipping back her robe. Artemis never realized that she had bought new clothes. He himself was still in his suit. Well, that explained the strange looks.

"Where did you get those clothes from?"

"I left a bunch over there for you." Holly said without turning around. She sounded annoyed.

Artemis went, and looked around. "Where did you change?"

"Just pull them over your head." Holly said irritably. She lifted up her shawl to show Artemis the emerald LEP suit she still had on underneath.

"Ah."

Artemis quickly pulled the material on, and flicked open the bracelet that was on his wrist.

"Communicator?"

Holly nodded, before turning around. "I can't get through to Foaly."

"This isn't a real world Holly; even Foaly's signals can't get to you in an imaginary world."

Holly glared at him for a moment, before throwing something at him. Artemis ducked out of the way. It hit the walkway, and everyone stopped to look at them. They were mainly women, wives Artemis guessed, on a shopping errand. There were a few men that were selling things on the makeshift stalls though.

"You're supposed to catch it, idiot." Holly hissed, before sliding over and picking it up. "It's okay." She assured the curious people who were wondering who this dark haired, pale blue eyed man and his pale red haired girl was. The shuffling was resumed rather slowly.

"Great way to stay inconspicuous." Artemis commented.

Holly's eyes flashed. Her hazel eyes angry. "Oh, and that was my fault?"

"Merely a fact, Holly dear. Now, what did Rafiki want? A pea, wasn't it?"

Holly rolled her eyes. "Don't try to change the subject, Mud Boy."

"I'm rather older than the time you met me -"

Just about when Artemis was about to launch into the official 'adult age' classification, a man came up to them, or more precisely, came up to Holly.

"Are you lost, miss?" he asked, grinning toothily.

Artemis was about to retort, when Holly held a held up to him.

"Not lost, but we've come from far. What is the name of this beautiful town?" she asked sweetly.

"Yeah, sure, lay it on thick." Artemis muttered. Holly shot him an evil glare.

"We are called the Belairians. Our humble town is the small village of Belair, the town next to the royal castle." The man said, bowing low.

Artemis hid a laugh by coughing.

"You, maiden, surely is here to see the prince?" he continued.

Holly tried to say something that didn't confirm or deny this. Artemis took over.

"What is the prince seeking, exactly? We were given vague information."

The man looked from Holly to Artemis. "But you surely know what the prince seeks! The Majesties wish for the prince to find a bride to be. Many princesses have tried and failed, and the prince has just come home from his travels. You, beauteous lady, is sure here to see him?"

Artemis coughed again. Actually, he sounded like he was choking.

"Erm… yeah, I'm here to see him. Can you please show me the way?" Holly said. This all sounded very familiar.

"Oh, of course! It would be an honor!" The man grinned toothily.

He trotted forwards, and cast a look back at Holly. She gestured him forwards, and he beamed again, and Holly followed him. Artemis ran to catch up.

"What on _earth_ do you think you're doing?" he demanded.

"Well, if we're going to live here, I can at least live like a princess." Holly smirked.

Artemis scowled. "Do you want Root back or not?"

Holly's smirk disappeared.

"Anyway, I know where this place is." Artemis continued. "I saw a place like this in a book that mother had kept from my… childhood."

Holly let the smirk back onto her face. Artemis was barely past his _childhood_, and he already couldn't stand to talk about it.

"Rafiki wanted a pea, and obviously it would not be just any random pea. This is a fairytale. _The Princess and the Pea_, you must've heard of it. That is the pea we must get."

"So, you read fairytales?" Holly jibed.

Artemis scowled. He didn't answer. "So, since you're pretending that you're a princess, they'll probably think I'm the servant." Artemis' scowl deepened.

Holly was genuinely enjoying herself. "Or personal assistant, if you want." She offered, smiling.

Artemis glared at her. He was just about to retort when the man spoke to them. Actually, when he spoke to Holly.

"We have arrived, fair maiden."

"When is he going to stop calling you 'fair maiden'? For god's sake, you're not even _human_." Artemis muttered.

Holly snapped her head around. Her eyes narrowed. "What?"

"Nothing." Artemis replied coolly.

Holly turned stiffly back to the man. "Thank you…?"

"Marcus. Feel free to ask for my assistance again!"

"Thank you so much, Marcus." Holly said with a smile, before she entered the double doors with Artemis still sulking at her side.

There was a long dirt path that led to the castle that was made out of stone and had numerous flags flapping at the tiptop of the towers. Artemis looked back and saw many of the people gawking at the fence at them. He turned back, and saw the two guards at the door. They took one look at Holly and let her in, and Artemis could see that they were thinking about blocking Artemis.

"This is my guide. Please let him through." Holly asked sweetly. Artemis scowled.

"Of course, madam. Just to say, the Queen and King and Prince are out in the grounds, but you are welcome to go in, they will be back soon." One of the guards replied.

"Thank you, I'll go inside." Holly smiled, and drifted past them, and halted in the doorway. Artemis tapped her shoulder. "Do you need some advice from your _guide_?"

"You know very well that it was the only way to get you in." She snapped.

"Well, why do you need me here? Madam?" Artemis swept her a mock bow.

Holly opened her mouth to retort, but found nothing appropriate to say. She closed her mouth, and Artemis straightened, staring at her. Holly shifted her gaze away, fidgeting with the hem of her robe.

"Well, you should go get some better clothes." Artemis finally said softly.

"Yeah."

Artemis pulled out a big sheet of cam foil, and he covered himself with it. Holly shielded, but hesitated. "Where are the bedrooms?"

Artemis rolled his eyes. "There's a spare closet in the bedroom five doors down to your right at the top of the stairs."

"How do you know?" Holly asked.

"Can we please stop wasting time?"

Holly turned, and ran up the stairs, leaving Artemis skulking near the window drapes. She turned, and opened the door slowly, trying to make it seem like a breeze blew it open. She went to the wardrobe, and grabbed the first thing she saw. There was another door in the room, and she opened it. White bathroom. She went in, and wedged a doorstop under the door. So old fashioned… Still shielded, she slipped on the bronze dress. It had an extremely long train, and Holly tore it off. She turned, unshielding and looking at her reflection in the mirror. It actually looked better without the train… She spotted a brush and a few clips, and went to fix her hair. She was rather enjoying this. Despite everything, Holly stopped rushing, trying her hair piled loosely around her shoulders or up in a bun. She went with loose. A few with swipes with the brush, and she buffed her cheeks with a little bit of the red powder after about a one minute debate with herself. Not much, it just made her look like she was more than warm. She snatched a large topaz clasp from the shelf, and pinned it to her hair, holing the stray strands away from her face.

Holly spun around a bit more, and made sure that the pin wasn't about to fall. She then walked out, not bothering to shield. She also pinched a pair of slippers from the bedroom. Well, she couldn't be expected to wear the LEP boots, could she? She peeked out the door, and her sharp eyes found a slight haze in the corner of the room, but no one was there. She ran down the stairs.

"Artemis!"

The haze didn't move. She crossed her arms. "Artemis! Don't be an idiot, you Mud Whelp. Take off the cam foil; I'm not doing this by myself." She hissed.

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Artemis was glancing out the window, and saw a carriage pulling up. Three figures stepped out, and they conversed with the guard. He saw the prince straighten up. He smirked. However, Artemis couldn't feel happy that his plan was falling into place. He didn't want Holly to be a princess… especially someone else's… Then someone came running down the stairs.

He froze, but Holly's voice called his name. "Artemis!"

Artemis turned, and the taunt on his lips died. Her now pale skin contrasted with the orange and brown dress she had hurriedly thrown on, her auburn locks now seemed longer than ever now that it was swirling down her shoulders. Her eyes sparked with anger, and Artemis couldn't help but just marvel at her. He felt something inside him. Like when he couldn't figure out a problem, rare as that feeling was. A little like frustration, but not too much like it. Holly's voice jerked him out of his thoughts.

"Artemis! Don't be an idiot, you Mud Whelp. Take off the cam foil; I'm not doing this by myself."

Artemis unfroze. He pulled off the cam foil, keeping his expression blank. Holly was glaring straight at him, but all he said was "They're coming. The door will open in about ten seconds, so I guess you'll have to meet your _prince_. His name is Edward."

Holly looked hesitant. Her gaze lingered on Artemis' pale face for a moment longer, but, predictably, the doorknob clicked and it swung open. Artemis' blue eyes left Holly's face, and she whirled around to face the people that had just pooled into the wide hall.

The first person she saw was probably the king. He was the typical stereotype king. Round, red in the face, scruffy beard, with a pair of laughing eyes and a big smile, and squat. The next person was the Queen. She was quite lanky, tall, also smiling, a bony hand clamped onto the King's shoulder. Then a few guards pooled around them loosely, and then another man came into the room, a disgruntled expression on his face. Since he was of a younger appearance and also wearing a crown, Holly guessed that he was the prince. There was nothing quite special about him, just the normal fairy tale prince. Brown, wavy hair, brown eyes, and tall with tight pants. He was also wearing a fur lined red cape. Holly had seen way to many Mud Man movies (downloaded, of course, by Foaly) to think too much about the person's appearance. She was thinking that the queen might recognize Holly wearing her dress and hairpin. No such thing happened though.

"Hello, my dear!" The queen said pleasantly, her face breaking into a wide smile.

Artemis was just brooding, wondering when the queen would try and fit her pea under Holly's bed so that they could get out of the place.

"Morning, your Majesty." Holly said, and curtseyed. She wondered if she was over doing it a bit. She cast a quick glance at Artemis. He had been so quiet she wondered slightly if he was still there.

"We're so sorry that you had to wait, we didn't realize that you were still coming. We thought that Edward had invited everyone already." The queen apologized.

"Oh no, it's fine." Holly said, smiling. "My father insisted that I come, but we got caught in a little bad weather."

"Oh my dear! Are you alright?"

Artemis rolled his eyes, but no one was paying attention to him. Just as well, really.

"Yes, healthy and whole." Holly replied cheerfully.

"This is my husband, Kind Edward. This is our son, Edward the Second."

They each walked forwards, and the king kissed her hand. Edward the Second, or Holly had already started to think of him, ETS stared into her eyes, and very slowly and deliberately kissed the back of her right hand. Holly smiled, but sighed inwardly. Obviously ETS was trying to act like a real gentleman. Holly didn't go for that type though. She was too much of a wild card to be docile and calm… she was a bit like Juliet. She would rather go running and screaming than sit down and converse politely with a cup of tea and sticking her small finger out as she held the miniscule china cup. However, that was what she saw that she might be doing. She had to suppress a moan by just thinking about it.

"And who is this fine gentleman?" The queen asked another warm smile from her behalf.

Holly was about to speak, but Artemis changed tact. He was not about to be introduced officially as 'the guide'.

"I am Alyssa's brother, Artemis." Artemis said, also bowing.

Holly raised an eyebrow at him at her name change and his status. Artemis' blue eyes flashed to her face, before looking back at the queen.

"Welcome, Artemis. Artemis, Alyssa, what nice names! Artemis, Alyssa." The queen repeated, as if playing with the word and seeing if it would fit as a future son and daughter in law. Artemis almost grimaced. Edward the Second was still staring at Holly, and he showed the IQ so far of an ape. He'd rather go back to St. Bartleby's than actually be in a family with such a bimbo.

Holly spoke up. "If you don't mind, your Majesty, my brother and I would like a place to rest. We have… traveled far."

The queen jerked back to reality. "Of course! Where are my manners? Hannah? Hannah!"

A grandmotherly looking house maid came bustling into the room. She took one look at Holly and Artemis and bowed quickly, a grin on her face.

"Yes, your majesties?"

"Sir Artemis and Dame Alyssa need resting quarters."

"Yes, madam. Please follow me." She said to Artemis and Holly.

Holly gave the King and Queen a good bye smile as she and Artemis walked away.

"Honestly, I thought that we'd never get away." Artemis muttered.

Holly smirked. "Why do I have to change my name?"

This time Artemis smirked. "Because Alyssa sounds so much better than Holly, don't you think?"

"And Edward sounds so much better than Artemis, don't you think?" Holly said sarcastically.

To her surprise, Artemis' blue eyes grew suddenly cold. He looked angry.

"I'm joking." Holly added.

He didn't reply. His mouth was set into a hard line, but his face was blank again, blue eyes staring straight ahead. Holly was confused. Artemis hardly showed _any_ emotion, much less one as powerful as anger. They walked on in silence before Hannah left them at the door of the room that was at the last one at the second level.

"Please make yourselves comfortable." Hannah said with a smile. "There are three doors. The one in the center is a bathroom, and the two on the side are bedrooms. I do hope that you enjoy your stay here, and pray that it will be permanent!"

Hannah bustled back through the door she came in, and Holly saw the three people in the hall still smiling pleasantly at them. She turned, and saw that Artemis had already opened the door and was going in. She hurried in quickly after him.

"What was that?" she hissed, once the door had safely clicked shut.

"What was what?" Artemis replied coldly. He went straight to the three rooms, and opened the one of the left.

"You! What brought all this on?"

"What on?" Artemis replied in the same voice. He turned and his icy blue eyes froze Holly to the ground. She couldn't say anything even when he had closed the door.

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Artemis closed the door behind him, trying very hard not to think. It was quite a hard thing to manage, since he was a genius, after all. He pulled open the curtains, and tried to think about everything but what he had just done. It was the first time he had had such an overreaction to such a minute thing… Stop it! He ordered himself. You don't need to think about it.

The sunlight poured through the wide window, and highlighted the blue colour coded room. Everything varied from shade of navy to sky blue, with golden edged cushions and pillows. The bed was large, the mattress about twenty centimeters thick. There was a wide desk, carefully carved out of wood and polished until it gathered the light and reflected Artemis' stiff figure on the engraved lion that was one of the table legs. Artemis walked to the window, and stared. There were children playing in the Center Square, every dirt path was lined with low hedges. The shops branched out to little houses, and Artemis saw the wall he and Holly had hidden behind. Holly…

Artemis turned abruptly, his eyes focusing on a fountain that was bubbling away. He tried to see the pipes that bumped up the tiles as it ran all the way to the river… Something on his wrist beeped. It was the bracelet that Holly had given him. However, it wasn't from Holly.

_WHR R U? F_

Artemis could only think of one person's name that started with F. Foaly. Artemis read the Gnommish symbols, and quickly sent a message back.

_TRPPED. AF_

He waited for two seconds.

_AF!_

Artemis rolled his eyes. Well, shouldn't Foaly expect that he would be here? It was only a question of where here was. He was sure that it wasn't a real world, but it wasn't comforting that he couldn't pinpoint time and place.

_YES, & HLLY_

He sent that, and was replying to the next message (_OMG. UVE GT 2 B JKING_), when his door burst open. Artemis stiffened, but sent his message (_WHN DO I JK?_), before Holly slapped him across the head and ripped the bracelet off.

"You, Mud Whelp, are supposed to tell me when we've gotten contact!"

Artemis turned, rubbing the back of his head, squinting at Holly as she pressed a few buttons and the screen widened. A few more words popped onto the screen.

_SO WHT HPPEND 2 U?_

Holly's fingers went flying over the little buttons, and Artemis just looked over her shoulder.

_TRYNG 2 GT CNNCTN_

Nothing but static played across the screen for a moment, but then you could see the faint outline of a head. The image sharpened a little, and Artemis could now see Foaly's eyes, but the image was still scraggly. He saw the pony's head bent over the keyboard, and second by second, the screen got clearer. Soon Artemis could see Foaly clearly, but the image was in black and white.

"Holly? Artemis? Can you hear me?"

"Yes, we can hear you." Artemis said. Holly didn't turn to look at him.

Foaly's head snapped up, and he gaped. Probably because he could only see Holly's face, Artemis thought.

"H… Ho… Holly?" he stuttered.

Artemis rolled his eyes. "No time to lose your head, pony boy."

The centaur's head snapped to where Artemis was leaning against the windowpane, glaring moodily at Holly. Artemis guessed that he was piecing two and two together, his brown (but now grey) eyes darting between the two of them. A smirk suddenly appeared on his face.

"Foaly, we're in trouble."

"Oh, big surprise." He sniggered.

"Foaly! Stop acting like an idiot!" Holly snapped.

Foaly tried to straighten his face. His face though, got grimmer as Holly filled him in roughly, about what had happened over the last few hours. Artemis noted that she left out a lot of parts concerning him. He found a little comfort in this.

"No name. Well, at least he's trying to act smart." Foaly scowled. "I don't know what I can do. You've got an unlimited amount of wishes though. Fowl can just keep wishing for more."

"No I can't."

Holly turned to look at him. Artemis tried to keep his face blank. Her hazel eyes were calm, though he thought he still saw an underlying spark of anger.

"What do you mean, Mud Boy?"

"I can only wish for more when I am in Rafiki's presence." Artemis replied expressionlessly.

"How do you know?"

It was the first time Holly had spoken to him since her entering outburst. Artemis shrugged.

"I just tried wishing for more. Nothing happened."

"Nothing would happen." Holly said in a brittle voice.

"Well, you can take that chance if you want." Artemis said, shrugging. "I won't."

Foaly was thoughtful. "He's got a point."

"He always has a point." Holly grumbled.

"Of course I do. That's what you like so much about me." Artemis said, smirking.

Then, just as Holly was fishing for a way to express how much she wanted to hit him (she doubted there was such a way to show it except for coming into physical contact with him), there was a knock on the door. No one knew exactly what to do for a moment, so the knock was unanswered. However, instead of just going away, the soft creak indicated that the door was opening, and someone was going to enter their room any minute.

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_**AN:** So how did you like it? Besides the complete lacing of interesting stuff and yeah… it's probably because I'm focusing on my new fic The Four Elements (go read it! The link's on my page… Chapter Two almost up.) So instead of me advertising, I'll shut up and you can review _

_xx Athemia_


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